By Donaia De Marco
September brings to mind renewal because for so long it marked the stages of beginning in grade school. I used to make resolutions that this year I wouldn't be whatever had given me grief the year before. And I always looked forward to a new teacher…just to see what this one would be like. It was usually quite an adjustment. In those days, September marked a new way I could define myself. What would this year bring? Certainly, we had the same kids in class, but I could always find a few who realized the opportunity to create something new. I recently watched the movie "October Sky" on the VCR, and I remembered the window of possibility school had always represented for me. I remember school as fun, a place to explore and develop potential. I guess I was lucky enough not to find it too confining…the structure gave me room to operate.
So, here we are again in September on the planet Earth in the year 1999, beginning another new school year (for hasn't it been written in very many places that we are here on Earth to learn). What a gift September is. Here in New England, it is a cool, clear transition month from the height and heat of summer to a full fall harvest! And what will we harvest this fall? Yes…something of what we have been sowing. It is interesting to be able to begin again, just as we are about to do some reaping. For the past eight months we have been exploring a responsive, loving Source and a Reality of Love, the sea of love we swim "in and of and have our being." And, we have been exploring the idea that we are also that Love which exists here creating from our individuality… beauty…in its myriad forms. That's the harvest…an abundance of beauty.
You see, we are beginning yet another school year to uncover, express and become "the love that we are" as Glenda Green would say is according to Jesus (Love without End: Jesus Speaks). What a wonder-filled task…to have the freedom to shape our reality as we get to love and love and love…and be loved. Why are we not consciously creating joy and peace and truth and love wherever we go with our words, with our actions or just with our breath and a gentle beam in our eyes? As we express love, we input our originality into Reality. Wow! This has nothing to do with outcomes. It is just practicing the Presence. For, haven't you discovered moments when you felt nudged to open a space for the presence of God to enter consciousness.
For the past twelve years, I have had the honor and privilege to study and practice the ancient, gentle healing art of Reiki. I have been given (or I have opened myself enough to receive) the opportunity to be in Holy Communion many, many times with other human beings experientially, kinesthetically and mutually. What I have experienced is something like this: after I becomes we, then something larger seems to become Present…and then somehow…there is simply One…wholeness, balance…no separation…floating in time and space going nowhere and everywhere in one round of silence. That experience may have been referred to as zero point by Greg Braden and others. Green says according to Jesus, "The mystery and miracle of love is that it can turn any set of opposites into a living, dynamic paradox." An endpoint of duality! Well, I have dived into that mix many times…very consciously…and the effects have been transformative yet quite subtle.
I had quite an insight the other day. For years, I have held an image of myself as quite an athlete, but recently I practiced for a softball game and quickly realized the concept of Donaia as an athlete is an illusion. Pop went that bubble…just like that. Somewhere along the years, that part of me passed away without me realizing it, but I was still carrying it around mentally and emotionally. I remember having a dream about ten years ago in which I was carrying around an occupied body bag, and somehow I was not able to dispose of it. Well, guess what…I think I've found its final resting-place. Co-incidentally, a few weeks ago, I had a visitor from Texas who has known me only three years, and she said, quite matter-of-factly when I told her the softball story, "Oh, I don't see you as an athlete. I see you as an artist!" This just may be me experiencing a mild case of the concept known as shape-shifting. But for me…from my perspective, it was an abrupt awakening!
I believed I was something I am not…at least not any longer. Surprise, surprise! I discovered what is gone is the aggressiveness required play competitive ball. Now, it feels like relief not to have to carry it around anymore. "I dewnt li kit," as my 2-˝ year old granddaughter, Riley McMuffin, would smartly say. I don't like "the push" any more. Aggression expires too much of my energy nowadays because it requires sheer will. Agility has come to mean Grace for me. This is no judgement on aggression. I marvel at the improvement this year in the woman players of the WNBA. But I discovered, for me, being an athlete was just a way I had structured myself so I could learn a mode of operation…a mode of operation that was rewarded and admired. Now, the tide seems to have changed. There seems to be little momentum for aggressiveness on this playing field called Love. Hence, my new disaffection for the call to charge.
According to Jesus, Green says Love is so powerful because it "calls everything into assembly." What will get magnetized as we express the Love that we are…in our work, in our homes, in our worlds? "Faith…faith…faith," is my new study. It looks like I've chosen a course in faith and Love for another school year…taking my little self into Reality…returning to a live-in relationship with a loving Source. Yikes!..I'm doing it again…like playing another round of golf.
Love Letters International
4101 Dauphine Drive
Austin, Texas 78727
Phone: (512) 833-7972
Fax: (512) 491-6565
©1998, 1999 & 2000 Love Letters International.
A division of unCommonBond Inc. All rights reserved.